Monday, August 2, 2010

This explains a lot of me...

Until I went to college, the only bathroom reading I ever had was "Calvin & Hobbes." I've always been a gigantic fan of Bill Watterson's writing, but only tonight did I realize his genius. Here's a selection of quotes, some of which are just flat out philosophically rich:

Calvin: From now on, I’m not doing anything I don’t want to do! The world owes me happiness, fulfillment and success…. I’m just here to cash in.

Calvin: I go to school, but I never learn what I want to know.

Calvin: I think life should be more like TV. I think all of life’s problems ought to be solved in 30 minutes with simple homilies, don’t you? I think weight and oral hygiene ought to be our biggest concerns. I think we should all have powerful, high-paying jobs, and everyone should drive fancy sports cars. All our desires should be instantly gratified. Women should always wear tight clothing, and men should carry powerful handguns. Life overall should be more glamorous, thrill-packed, and filled with applause, don’t you think?… Then again, if real life was like that, what would we watch on television?

Calvin: I used to hate writing assignments, but now I enjoy them. I realized that the purpose of writing is to inflate weak ideas, obscure poor reasoning, and inhibit clarity. With a little practice, writing can be an intimidating and impenetrable fog! Want to see my book report?

Calvin: I wonder if you can refuse to inherit the world.

Calvin: If you do the job badly enough, sometimes you don’t get asked to do it again.

Calvin: It’s hard to be religious when certain people are never incinerated by bolts of lightning.

Calvin: They say winning isn’t everything, and I’ve decided to take their word for it.

Calvin: It seems like once people grow up, they have no idea what’s cool.

Calvin: My brain always rejects attitude transplants.

Calvin: Nothing spoils fun like finding out it builds character.

Calvin: Reality continues to ruin my life.

Calvin: Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.

Calvin: The only skills I have the patience to learn are those that have no real application in life.

Calvin: There’s never enough time to do all the nothing you want.

Calvin: There’s no problem so awful that you can’t add some guilt to it and make it even worse!

Calvin: To make a bad day worse, spend it wishing for the impossible.

Calvin: What assurance do I have that your parenting isn’t screwing me up?

Calvin: You know how Einstein got bad grades as a kid? Well, mine are even worse!

Calvin: You know how people are. They only recognize greatness when some authority confirms it.

Calvin: That’s one of the remarkable things about life. It’s never so bad that it can’t get worse.

Calvin: Everybody seeks happiness! Not me, though! That’s the difference between me and the rest of the world. Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria!

Calvin: Mom and Dad say I should make my life an example of the principles I believe in…But everytime I do, they tell me to stop it.

Hobbes: I don’t know which is worse…that everyone has his price, or that the price is always so low.

Hobbes: I had resolved to be less offended by human nature, but I think I blew it already.

Hobbes: So basically, this maverick is urging everyone to express his individuality through conformity in brand-name selection?

Hobbes: So the secret to good self-esteem is to lower your expectations to the point where they’re already met?

Calvin’s Mom: How can kids know so much and still be so dumb?

Calvin’s Dad: Why is it that I can recall a cigarette ad jingle from 25 years ago, but I can’t remember what I just got up to do?

Calvin’s Dad: By the finite patience vested in me, I hereby dub thee “mud.” You may rise.

Susie: Talking with you is the conversational-equivalent of an out of body experience.

Susie: I was going to ask you to play House, but I think you’d be a weird example for our children.

Susie: Uh oh… here comes Calvin – the Incurable Weirdness poster child.

Calvin: This piece of pie is awfully darn small!
Calvin’s Mom: Life could be a lot worse, Calvin.
Calvin: Life could be a lot better too! … But worse is more likely.

Calvin: Dad, where do babies come from?
Calvin’s Dad: Most people just go to Sears, buy the assembly kit, and read the instructiions.
Calvin: I CAME FROM SEARS?!?!
Dad: No, you were a Blue Light Special at Kmart. Almost as good, and a lot cheaper.
Calvin: AAUUGHHH!
Calvin’s Mom: Dear, what are you telling him now?!

Calvin’s Dad: The world isn’t fair, Calvin.
Calvin: I know, but why isn’t it ever unfair in my favor?

Hobbes: How come we play war and not peace?
Calvin: Too few role models.

Calvin: People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don’t realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world.
Hobbes: Isn’t your pants zipper supposed to be in the front?

Susie: Do you have your line memorized for the nutrition play, Calvin?
Calvin: I’m still learning it. Being an onion is a difficult role, you know. What are you?
Susie: I’m “fat.”
Calvin: No, I mean in the play.
Susie: Anyone ELSE want to say it?!?
Calvin: Aackk! Understudy! Understudy!

Calvin: Ms. Wormwood, I’m a fierce advocate of the separation of church and state. Nevertheless, I feel the need for spiritual guidance as I face the day’s trials. Therefore, I was wondering if I could strip down, smear myself with paste, and set fire to this little effigy of you in a non-denominational sort of way.

Calvin: If ignorance is bliss, this lesson would appear to be a deliberate attempt to deprive me of happiness, the pursuit of which is my unalienable right according to the Declaration of Independence. I therefore assert my patriotic prerogative to not know this material. I’ll be out in the playground.

Calvin: Some people complain all the time! They complain about the least little thing! If something bugs them, they never let go of it! They just go on and on long after anyone else is interested! It’s just complain, complain, complain! People who gripe all the time really drive me nuts! You’d think they’d change the subject after a while, but they never do! They just keep griping until you start to wonder, ‘What’s wrong with this idiot?’ But they go on complaining and repeating what they’ve already said!
Hobbes
: Maybe they’re not very self aware.
Calvin
: Boy, that’s another thing that gets on my nerves!

Calvin: I sure am great! I’m one of the greatest people who ever lived! How lucky people are to know someone as great as me! I’m great in so many great ways! In fact, I’m so great that my greatness is…
Susie: You’re not great! You’re the most conceited blowhard I’ve ever met!
Calvin: When you’re great, people often mistake candor for bragging.

Hobbes: Shouldn’t you be doing your homework?
Calvin: I’m pretty sure the assignment was optional.
Hobbes: Denial springs eternal.
Calvin: It’s not denial. I’m just very selective about the reality I accept.

Ms. Wormwood: Calvin! Pay attention! We’re studying GEOGRAPHY! Now what state do you live in?
Calvin: Denial.
Ms. Wormwood: [sighs] Well, I don’t suppose I can’t argue with that..

Calvin: Sometimes when I’m talking, my words can’t keep up with my thoughts. I wonder why we think faster than we can speak.
Hobbes: Probably so we can think twice.

Food for thought.


JMRB.


Sunday, August 1, 2010

Oh, Happy Day..

I'm not going to church today, but I watched this. Keep in mind these are white people. From Canada. Moreover, they're French-Canadian. Bearing that, I present to you: ssoouuuuuuuuulllllll.

Friday, July 30, 2010

The Proof Is in the...

About a month ago I found myself stuck in a frame of mind saying "Perhaps religion is indeed the opiate of the masses. And if so, a damn fine opiate it is." Maybe it's only as real as I believe it to be; if it's this personal faith that I claim it to be, there's no need for it to resound with anyone else. For some reason, I was OK with that line of thinking. Perhaps in some way I "tolerated" myself into tolerating my faith. Over the course of the last week, however, I've come to realize, see, and just flat-out believe that that's not good enough.

I do believe our God is personal, and our relationship with Him/Her is personal. And indeed faith can and very often does make otherwise intolerable circumstances bearable. But I've just become absolutely convicted that it's real.

Last weekend I went home to lead music at Discovery, a 48ish hour youth retreat, for the sixth consecutive year. I was unenthused, to say the least; it had become such a routine, and the circumstances were frustrating. I was piecing together a band, with no practice, and more importantly little concern to how good it was. But, as seems to so often be the case, everything fell into place. I don't think God did that for me, though; it almost seemed to be in spite of me, in spite of my lackluster attitude, until Saturday afternoon. My wonderful sister had decided that for "Mission Time" one of the 3 groups of tweens was going to the Magnolia House (a nursing home about a hundred yards away from the fellowship hall in which Discovery weekend is spent) to sing to and just generally be around old people. You know what singing means: James is going to lead music again. With this news, my already ebbed enthusiasm further waned.

I generally don't vibe well with the elderly. But after playing "Amazing Grace" with about twenty youths and fifteen people over 80, I was really enjoying myself. Then an elderly man very dear to my heart spoke up after a few minutes of conversation with, "Oh, do y'all do 'Amazing Grace'?" Right in the middle of Round 2 of perhaps the greatest song ever written, my heart completely melted. I'd come back home to a truth that I easily stray from in my daily dealings: My Jesus lives in music. It's what I'm supposed to do and where he always seems to find me, or I find him. I'm not sure which direction that flows.

Back to the universality point I began this rambling with. I absolutely cannot believe that human beings crafted "How Great Thou Art," "Because He Lives," and "Amazing Grace" on their own. There's just no way. Those songs, and countless others, are where my God constantly abides. He's everywhere, so I'm told, but that's my center. Many years ago I remember hearing someone say "If you find yourself farther away from God, guess who moved."

I'm very Methodist. We don't mention "Hell" much, or "the blood" much. Perhaps rightfully so. I buy into the goodness of Christ and his Grace being infinitely greater than any pain or suffering Hell could inflict, so we ought to moreso focus on the positives. But this phrase absolutely will not leave my little head:

"And when I think that God, his son not sparing
Send Him to die, I scarce can take it in.
That on the cross, my burden gladly bearing
He bled and died to take away my sin."

That's real.

"Through many dangers, toils, and snares I have already come
'Tis Grace that brought me safe thus far, and Grace shall lead me home."

A person couldn't just sit down and say, "I'm gonna write a song for my opiate" and come up with that.

He. Is. Real.

And for that, my soul sings to my Savior, God, "How great thou art."

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Love Song

First thing's first:


From about 2:30 til the end is possibly my favorite piece of music. It's so dynamic, well-made, and just flat out sonically gorgeous. Moving on....

I've been thinking recently (say, twelve minutes ago) about what I call God's "Theory of Originality." Paul writes in Galatians 5 and 6 (http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=galatians%205.25-6.10&version=MSG) about the importance of your life's uniqueness. My favorite bit is this:
"Make a careful exploration of who you are and the work you have been given, and then sink yourself into that. Don't be impressed with yourself. Don't compare yourself with others. Each of you must take responsibility for doing the creative best you can with your own life."

I think the idea has the power to genuinely change lives; I know it's greatly affected mine. Just the notion of how comparing your being to another is futile is pretty awesome. The best I can figure it, we're all indescribably crafted individuals. Your parents don't meet, the womb's a little colder, you don't have some random experience when you're five, and your world can be altogether different. We're multifactorial creatures, to say the least. Why is that significant to this passage? Because God made, is making, and will ever make only one of you. At no space in time is there an exact replica. And because of that, we all have different capabilities, different weaknesses, different strengths, so to compare yourself to anyone else will always and forever be to weigh apples against oranges.

We have insecurities, we have shame, we have instances in which we never quite meet our or another's expectations. But as I'm keen to say, expectation is the root of all disappointment. I believe God's impression of us (if there is such a thing to the Creator who knows and is all) is in what we are doing at the present. The value in our lives is not to hit a standard, or meet an expectation, or be better than anyone who has been, is, or is to come; the most important thing we can do is to do what we can, where we are, with whom we're with. I don't think everything is relative; instead I propose that it's in varying absolutes. In any scenario your best remains your best. Five minutes later, things have changed and you are still capable of that best, though it may not match that of the situation prior.

In short, God made one of you, and he made you on purpose. The success of our life is not in achieving more than a little, or just short of a lot, but rather proving to be an enduring message and embodiment of love, hope, and grace. I thank God every day that besides being all of those things incarnate, he is also the creator of second chances. So even if I miss that first opportunity to do the creative best I can with my life, I exist in another one at that same moment. I guess you could say we're infinite in that respect, that we're perpetually in an opportunity. I think that through Grace, God allows that to be our reality, to exist every moment in an open window to try our best to be his likeness.

Super bad ass, if you ask me.



Sunday, March 14, 2010

Just Dance...It's Gonna Be OK.

I talked for a long time about trusting God, about believing that everything that happens is exactly what's supposed to happen. The notion that the world was indeed perfectly synced to God's plan was comforting; mainly because everything was great. Fast forward to March 14, 2010, and for the first time, I'm buying it through trial.

I've never been in a group and not been the leader. Never been on a team and not been the captain. But now, I'm in the passenger seat of this Millennium Falcon called JMRB's life, and it's right. I have no idea what's going to become of my "career," my love life, or who I'll come home to in a year. But that's just the way it's supposed to be. The music's been cued up, and all I can do is dance to it.

I truly believe that God is Good. All the time. Not because He makes things easy, or because He gives James what he wants, but simply because He is who He says He is ($1 to Dr. Teddy Trost for teaching me the significance of "Ego Eimi"). I'm going to be just fine; the only thing I can do is to be an original, to make the creative best I can of my own life, and to let God shape that. Galatians 5 and 6 in The Message make me better; I thank Chrysalis for that tiny denim New Testament every time I think of it.

For the record, the blog title is simply a metaphor and an ode to Lady GaGa for making one of the catchiest records of all time. I do not dance literally; my soul is not expressed through rhythmic gyration. It's through bringing joy; joy that I know only because of the infinite Grace of Jesus Christ. So I'm gonna turn up this jam of existence and break it down. It's gonna be OK. And much more.

Love,
JMRB